“Just a friend. I’ll handle it first,” Lin Fanxing blurted out.
You still have the nerve to message me, you bastard? If you hadn’t, I’d have almost forgotten we were still in that ambiguous phase right now!
So he took his phone into the kitchen, and the calm he had just regained was shattered again into chaos. Leaning against the refrigerator door, the vibration of the old fridge’s cooling system numbed his back.
A needle-like pain stabbed his chest.
It still hurts.
After all, it was someone he had sincerely treasured for two years. Human love has a delayed effect, and so does hate, but the most complicated state is when love and hate intertwine. If emotions could be switched on and off so easily, there wouldn’t be so many tragic lovers in this world.
Lin Fanxing drank a glass of water, and only then did the tightness in his chest ease. He moved his fingers and replied: [Busy.]
He had never replied to Qin Xin like that before. Whenever Qin Xin asked something, he used to want to report every detail of his day, sharing every minute of his emotions. His affection had been too obvious, too intense, which made Qin Xin feel it was all within reach, so he not only failed to cherish it, but eventually trampled it into the mud.
If it weren’t for that sudden message from him, Lin Fanxing might not have flown off that overpass.
But fate had decided everything. Coming back was better.
Perhaps Lin Fanxing’s reply was unexpected, and his attitude was unusually cold, as Qin Xin immediately replied: [Fanxing Ge, what are you busy with? Can you tell me?]
Oh? Can you tell me?
Since when did you ever ask me like that before?!
Lin Fanxing let out a self-mocking laugh. Fanxing ah Fanxing, remember this: stay away from Qin Xin in real life from now on!
[Sure. Send me 500 yuan, and I’ll see how sincere you are; then I’ll tell you.]
This was the first time Lin Fanxing had ever asked Qin Xin for money. In the past, it would have been impossible. How could he ask his idol for money? Wouldn’t that pollute their feelings?
He used to be so afraid Qin Xin would misunderstand him as someone who only cared about fame and resources that he never dared mention anything material. Not to mention asking for money, he even used to send Qin Xin red packets himself.
If the weather were hot, he’d send one for drinks. If it were cold, he’d send one for cake. If it were neither hot nor cold, he’d still send one to say, “Have a good day.”
Now, let alone asking for money, even if Qin Xin stood in front of him and said he wanted to make a movie, Lin Fanxing would dare to put his hands on his hips and say: “Let me be the male lead, or I’ll expose you online!”
Xiao Xin: [?]
On the other side, that man first sent a question mark. Lin Fanxing didn’t bother replying, as he didn’t want to be the one always initiating conversation anymore. But the next second, his phone vibrated again, and a red packet arrived.
Xiao Xin: [I just want you to be happy.]
Heavens! What was this? Qin Xin actually sent him money?! That stingy bastard actually coughed up coins?!
Lin Fanxing stared at the screen as if he had seen a ghost. But that wasn’t the only shock; another vibration came, and a short video was sent.
“Fanxing Ge, take it. Don’t ignore me.”
In the video, Qin Xin was probably at home, wearing comfortable loungewear, with freshly washed hair slightly messy from drying. Those rare, irreplaceable phoenix eyes were his most distinctive feature, dazzling on the big screen.
Unlike his mother Qiao Lian’s shifting, seductive gaze, Qin Xin’s eyes were youthful, for he didn’t yet know how to weaponize them fully. But precisely because of that inexperience, his gaze made people lower their defenses, relax their vigilance, and fall into his trap without realizing it.
In the past, Lin Fanxing would have carefully saved every one of his videos. Now, he no longer bothered.
He didn’t reply, but still… accepted the red packet. Even though it was only 500 yuan, it still counted as his first time squeezing a little gold coin out of Qin Xin, that iron rooster!
“What friend? Which friend?”
Before Lin Fanxing could put his phone down, his benefactor, still wearing that damned helmet, walked straight into the kitchen. The moment he asked, Lin Fanxing clearly shut off his screen and tucked the phone into his pocket.
Qin Xin stared at the pocket where the phone disappeared into.
Why?
Why were Lin Fanxing’s other friends allowed to message him, but he wasn’t even allowed to ask?
“Just an assistant,” Lin Fanxing quickly answered. “I asked him to help me find work. I’ve thought it through. When I go out to work, it’ll be in public places. Those people won’t dare to come at me so openly. Besides, their goal is to get their money back, not to kill me.”
Lin Fanxing scratched the back of his head, then suddenly broke into a smile.
“Hey, Ge, do you want a popsicle?”
A popsicle? Qin Xin couldn’t quite keep up with his train of thought.
“No, I have a weak stomach.”
“Alright then… sigh, let me think what you can eat…”
Lin Fanxing was just that kind of person; whoever treated him well, he immediately thought about how to repay them.
The two returned to the living room. The “Fei Ge” benefactor pulled out a small pinwheel from his pocket again and stood by the table hesitantly.
“You bought this for me?” Lin Fanxing’s eyes lit up.
“Mm.” Qin Xin handed it to him. “I saw it on the way, at a street stall. The goldfish pinwheel is supposed to bring good luck. I got it for you…”
The little red goldfish was made of paper, roughly crafted, and worth about five yuan. But Lin Fanxing accepted it happily and spun it in his hand.
“This is it! I used to make these myself in the countryside!”
Qin Xin’s fingers twitched. He almost said, “As long as you like it,” but in the end, he said nothing.
……………….
Because of his weak health, Qin Xin couldn’t stay long and went home before 10:30. Fang Bo still brought him his medicine, and Qin Xin still poured it down without a drop left, because he knew he wasn’t actually sick.
His “illness” was an illusion created by the family doctor and his mother, something they had made him believe all along.
Before going to sleep, Qin Xin hesitated again and again before sending their very first message:
[Going to sleep. Good night.]
Fanxing: [Sleep well, sleep well! You need rest the most right now!]
Qin Xin’s WeChat had no Moments, and his profile was always locked. His avatar was the Doberman he had raised as a child, named Dudu.
He looked like a very boring person… for the first time, Qin Xin thought so himself. Everyone else’s Moments were full of color and life, so how could he possibly attract a star like that?
After thinking for a long time, Qin Xin unexpectedly opened his Moments, but the person who had known how to act since he was 14 suddenly didn’t know how to post his first update. A photo of himself was out of the question, for Fanxing hated him. So maybe just a sentence?
Would that seem too pretentious? Too literary?
Tossing and turning, Qin Xin fell into a vortex called “being trapped in love.”
In the past, he had only seen Lin Fanxing as an obsession in his heart, a rare source of happiness, and a stranger who once extended him a friendly hand. But after truly getting close to him, that obsession had transformed into something far more dangerous…
Desire.
Why couldn’t Lin Fanxing just be his?
The escalation of that obsession was so fast that even Qin Xin hadn’t expected it. The real Lin Fanxing was so interesting, so lively; even in hardship, he was someone who smiled easily. A skewer of grilled squid was enough to make him squint in satisfaction. He liked sitting with one leg on the chair rung while eating, and curling his legs up on the sofa.
He wouldn’t look down on a five-yuan pinwheel. He knew how good boba milk tea tasted. He would even offer a popsicle to a stranger…
Someone like Qin Xin, who had lived half-dead and half-breathing for years, had never seen a human so full of vitality before. He almost wondered if Lin Fanxing was from another planet. Why, if they were both the same species, did he have so much life in him?
He wanted Lin Fanxing. Wanted to make him his. Didn’t want anyone else to find him or share his smile.
Suddenly, Qin Xin got out of bed and pulled a black short-sleeved T-shirt from his backpack. It was clothing he had taken from Lin Fanxing’s rental apartment. Those people had ransacked everything, but this cheap shirt had been the only thing left untouched.
So Qin Xin folded it neatly and placed it beside his pillow, holding the black rectangle of fabric as if it were Fanxing himself.
“Good night.”
He even patted it gently, then took a photo with his phone and nervously posted it to Moments.
Meanwhile, Lin Fanxing had just pulled out a metal biscuit tin. At first, he thought it would be expired cookies, but after struggling to open it, he found dozens of colorful spools of thread inside.
It seems I was right… This place was definitely owned by an elderly woman who loved life, enjoyed gardening, hoarded medicine, and even kept sewing kits. Although Lin Fanxing had never met her, he still silently greeted her across time and space: Thank you for your house. I’ll only stay for a short while.
Before going to bed, he decided to scroll through Moments. Just then, someone updated their post, a guy with a Doberman profile picture named “Fei Ge.”
Fei… Ge?
What kind of big “Ge” was that, even… so Lin Fanxing giggled for a while, then casually changed the contact remark to…
Little Fei: [Good night. Sweet dreams.]
The attached photo showed a pillow, but the white bedding set was quite different from his “savior’s” usual all-black impression. But next to the white pillow was indeed something black… like a rolled-up towel?
Lin Fanxing zoomed in but couldn’t figure out what it was. He gave it a like first, a little red heart for his savior, then restrained his curiosity. Forget it, no need to ask. That must be Little Fei’s comfort object.
Such a kid… still needs a comfort object to sleep.
Thinking of his own comfort object, Lin Fanxing sighed. Right now, he’d rather fall asleep holding a sudden windfall of money.
……………..
The next evening, Fang Feiyu saw Qin Xin pushing his motorcycle out again.
“Wait!” Fang Feiyu didn’t want to watch his friend fall deeper into corruption. “You’re going to see that ‘canary’ again? Who exactly is she?”
Qin Xin, already wearing his helmet, was also holding something in his hand, asking, “Did you sell your stocks?”
“Why do you keep pushing me to sell?! I’ve been studying the market online; experts say it can still rise another 2,000 yuan!” Fang Feiyu grabbed him. “You’re not going anywhere!”
Qin Xin sighed. It seemed Fang Feiyu wouldn’t listen until he actually lost money. Fine, let him take a small loss first, then he’ll behave. “Why can’t I go?”
“I’m afraid your little canary is going to drain you dry! If my dad diagnoses you with kidney deficiency, that’s embarrassing…” Fang Feiyu shook his head. “And even if you’ve been semi-retired these past two and a half years, you’re still the youngest Best Actor. That’s a big name. The editor-in-chief of Urban even called me personally to thank you for ‘honoring their humble publication.’ If you get photographed with someone or leave evidence, how are you supposed to act again in the future?!”
“I actually wish there were photos,” Qin Xin said flatly. “But no one bothers to take them.” He then suddenly hugged Fang Feiyu, continuing, “Bro, do you trust me?”
Fang Feiyu froze, and a strange feeling rose in his chest. “Yeah… I just feel like you’ve been weird lately,” he said. “Not like before.”
“Then trust me and listen to me. I… I won’t harm you.” Qin Xin bumped his helmet lightly against Fang Feiyu’s forehead.
If his inference was correct, he and Fang Feiyu… were actually half-brothers, for he suspected his biological father might be Fang Bo.
Fang Bo had divorced long ago. In his past life, before he died, Qin Xin had once seen Fang Bo and Qiao Lian tightly embracing. How ironic. His biological mother hated him, while his biological father had, from childhood, essentially been poisoning him, making his body weak so he would be bedridden for long periods.
“I’m leaving. Remember what I said.” Qin Xin hugged Fang Feiyu again, thinking, In this life, I won’t let anything happen to you. I’ll be fine, and so will you.
………….
Meanwhile, Lin Fanxing was at home listing suspects related to his “little brother’s” classmates. Three of them were key targets, and he actually knew all of them, thinking he’d investigate them one by one later.
Just then, the door was knocked on.
Like a little canary who had waited all day for his sugar daddy, Lin Fanxing happily rushed over. He checked the peephole and immediately opened the door.
“Have you eaten?” Qin Xin asked. He had brought snacks on the way.
“I’ve eaten. I bought some pastries myself.” Lin Fanxing pulled him inside and closed the door. “I specially got you some easy-to-digest osmanthus rice cakes!”
“For… me?” Qin Xin froze. “Where did you get the money?”
“My friend gave me living expenses.” Of course, Lin Fanxing couldn’t tell him it was the red envelope from Qin Xin. “You said yesterday your stomach is weak, so this suits you. Oh, right, I also made something…”
With that, he grabbed the savior’s wrist and quickly slipped something onto it.
“You made this?” Qin Xin looked down in surprise.
It was a handmade bracelet, woven with red and gold threads. The thin strands were twisted into thicker cords, the red and gold intertwined, with an adjustable knot.
“Of course,” Lin Fanxing proudly patted his chest. “I learned it back in the countryside. Every little girl had one. This knot style is called a peace knot, an eight-strand weaving. I don’t really have anything else to give you right now, so it’s just something simple.”
Qin Xin ran his fingers over it several times, asking, “You’re really giving this to me?”
“Yeah. Remember to bring the rice cakes home tonight; they’re really good.” Lin Fanxing said, hands on his hips, smiling.
Who would’ve thought… spending Qin Xin’s money to buy pastries for another man… Felt super, extra great! He absolutely must never spend money on Qin Xin again in this life!
“Oh, right, do you want something cool to drink? Can we drink it on the way?” Even as he thought that, Lin Fanxing immediately bought another drink for his savior.
T.N: If you like his novel, you can read up to chapter 21 on my Patreon, with new updates coming every week!
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