Jian Ru did not want to remain at the estate for even a moment longer, but unfortunately, his body had other ideas.
He drank the medicinal decoction, but he still came down with a fever.
On the first day after waking, it was still Sun Yushuang who looked after him. The man remained proud and distant, and Jian Ru did not particularly want to see him, though he had little choice. Most of the time, however, he was half-asleep, so they barely exchanged a few words.
On the second day, for some reason, Sun Yushuang was replaced by an elderly woman surnamed Jin.
Aunt Jin was remarkably capable and hardworking. Unlike Sun Yushuang, she did not speak with hidden barbs or sarcasm, though her personality was rather blunt.
Even in the height of summer, Jian Ru was still being covered with thick quilts. While burning with fever, he had sweated through his clothes and bedding, and after being wrapped up that way for two days and two nights, Aunt Jin entered his room one morning carrying hot water. She shut the doors and windows tightly, then yanked back his quilt.
“Good heavens!” she shouted in her booming voice. “It’s gotten so sweaty it smells sour!”
“…”
Well… Jian Ru could smell it too.
His face immediately turned red with embarrassment, and he wished the ground would open up and swallow him. When he blushed, the scar on half his face reddened as well, making it stand out even more starkly than usual, but Aunt Jin stared at it without the slightest trouble. She even reached out and touched it, then looked him over with obvious regret.
“What a pity. This child was quite handsome originally. Such a shame for a good-looking ger to have half his face scarred like this.”
Since the accident, this was the first time anyone had spoken so openly about his scar without malice, and Jian Ru truly did not mind. But when Aunt Jin’s rough hands started reaching for his clothes, he could no longer endure it.
No matter what she said, he absolutely refused to let her touch him.
Unable to win the argument, Aunt Jin eventually handed him the basin and washcloth and told him to wipe himself down. As she walked out, she sighed dramatically, “When I said you weren’t good-looking, you didn’t get angry. But when I try to help wash you, you keep refusing.”
But really… it wasn’t that Jian Ru didn’t appreciate her kindness. He was simply unaccustomed to it… and embarrassed. Clutching his collar tightly closed in case Aunt Jin rushed back towards him, he forced a placating smile onto his face.
“Let’s see whether you’ll let your husband undress you after you get married!” Aunt Jin glared at him.
Jian Ru’s face instantly turned bright red, and Aunt Jin burst out laughing and left the room. But after the woman departed, a trace of sadness crept into Jian Ru’s heart.
Marriage was probably something he would never have in this lifetime.
In the past, he had refused to accept that. He had always believed that even after what happened to him, he could still live like everyone else. But Jiang Maocai and Zhang Jiao had extinguished that hope completely.
Thinking of them, Jian Ru unconsciously began rubbing his hands together again, as though he wanted to scrape the skin from them. But in the end, knowing people were still waiting outside, he dared not linger. He quickly wiped himself down and gave his hair a simple wash.
Earlier, Aunt Jin had brought him a clean set of clothes. After changing out of his sleeping robe, he picked up the outer garment and ran his fingers over it.
Then he carefully put it back exactly where it had been.
The fabric was obviously expensive, and the style was unlike anything he had ever seen. It was so beautiful, he didn’t even dare look at it straight.
Jian Ru did not want to take advantage of anyone’s generosity. So he had no choice but to wear the sleeping robe for now because he had nothing else to change into, but when it came time to leave, he intended to wear his own clothes home.
Aunt Jin returned after guessing he had finished changing. She replaced the sweat-soaked bedding and found him a lighter blanket.
“The people here don’t understand these things,” she muttered. “You shouldn’t smother someone who’s running a fever. Wear what you’d normally wear and cover yourself as you normally would. Take your medicine properly, and you’ll be completely recovered in three or four days.”
As Jian Ru helped fold the bedding away, he asked curiously, “You know medicine?”
“Oh, I was the old madam’s dowry maid when she married into the family,” Aunt Jin waved a hand dismissively. “It’s been decades. After seeing and hearing so much over the years, I’ve picked up a thing or two about common illnesses.”
Hearing that, Jian Ru did not spare a single thought for why someone who served the family matriarch was now taking care of him. Instead, his face filled with admiration. “That still means you must enjoy learning and figuring things out,” he said.
“Otherwise, how come other people can’t understand it, but you can?”
He meant every word sincerely, for Jian Ru had always considered himself rather ordinary. Whenever he and Zhang Jiao visited the town and saw the capable gers working in shops, attracting customers and managing business, he often found himself wishing he possessed even a fraction of their abilities.
As for Aunt Jin, everyone liked honest praise. Looking at him, she smiled warmly.
“You child… certainly knows how to sweet-talk people.”
…………….
That evening, after drinking his medicine, Jian Ru still had a fever, but it was far milder than during the previous two days. The lighter blanket felt much more comfortable, and for the first time since arriving, he slept soundly.
The next morning, he immediately began insisting that he should leave. Aunt Jin not only glared at him but even made as if to pinch his arm, complaining, “What nonsense are you stirring up now?! Stay put. Go home after you’re completely recovered!”
Jian Ru wanted to argue that he was already well, but Aunt Jin’s imposing manner was too much for him. So he didn’t dare say another word. After breakfast and another bowl of medicine, Aunt Jin announced that she was taking him around the estate for a walk so he could get some sunlight and drive away the lingering illness.
Since arriving several days ago, Jian Ru had never once stepped outside the room.
He was curious, certainly.
But he did not want to trouble anyone.
He was also worried about encountering the estate’s owners. They didn’t know who he was, and if they asked questions, explaining himself would be awkward. And then there was his face. But after being betrayed by both the man he loved and his closest friend, after nearly dying, he had finally come to terms with many things.
If people wanted to stare, let them stare.
If they wanted to gossip, let them gossip.
It wasn’t as though their words would take a piece of flesh off him.
This was who he was, and people could think whatever they liked.
But the owners of this estate had taken him in for so many days. They had fed him, clothed him, housed him, and cared for him. To him, that was a tremendous kindness, and he didn’t want to frighten them.
Unfortunately, Aunt Jin was exactly the sort of person who never took no for an answer.
The moment she decided they were going out, she produced a new set of clothes and tried to dress him in them. Going outside was one thing, but wearing new clothes was another.
No matter what she said, Jian Ru refused.
In the end, he stubbornly demanded his old clothes and put them on instead. Aunt Jin looked him up and down with obvious disgust, shaking her head repeatedly.
Jian Ru knew perfectly well how shabby he looked.
The clothes had originally been meant for farm work around the house, and after being dragged through the river, several places were torn and damaged.
To put it plainly, he looked rather pathetic.
When they finally headed out, Aunt Jin walked ahead while Jian Ru stayed behind to close the door. He had barely finished shutting it when…
Smack!
A hand landed squarely on his backside. Jian Ru jumped in fright and hurriedly turned around, only to see that Aunt Jin had already withdrawn her hand and was now grinning broadly.
“This butt of yours may look small, but there’s plenty of flesh on it,” she praised. “Good!”
“…”
Jian Ru nearly died of embarrassment. He couldn’t exactly get angry at an elder, so all he could do was puff out his cheeks and sulk silently. Seeing him like that, Aunt Jin merely laughed and continued walking, while Jian Ru followed behind her with a red face.
As she walked, she muttered to herself with evident satisfaction, “Thin is thin, but those hips aren’t narrow! Good childbearing stock!”
Jian Ru had no idea what she was talking about. Lowering his head, he glanced at himself but couldn’t see anything remarkable.
……………….
The weather was unexpectedly beautiful.
For the first time in what felt like ages, the sun had finally come out. In northern regions, mornings in August were neither hot nor cold, and the air was pleasantly comfortable.
The Li estate kept many horses. Each one was tall, powerful, and handsome, so anyone within dozens of li who wanted to buy a horse would inevitably come here to have a look. The Li family actually lived in town, but because the estate contained vast pastures, members of the family often came to stay during summer and winter.
In summer, they rode horses. In winter, they hunted. The estate itself consisted of two connected courtyards. There were stone tables, stone benches, and grape arbors scattered throughout. It wasn’t especially delicate or refined, but to Jian Ru, it was already a level of wealth and grandeur he had never seen before.
He dared not stare too openly, afraid of revealing how provincial he was.
Fortunately, they encountered very few people along the way. Only a young maid of perhaps ten or eleven hurried back and forth through the courtyard, taking advantage of the good weather to air out bedding.
When she saw them, she immediately greeted Aunt Jin respectfully. Then, her eyes darted briefly across Jian Ru’s face, and she visibly startled and hurriedly looked away.
The girl was merely curious, and Jian Ru didn’t take offense.
As for Aunt Jin, she led him through both courtyards before taking him for a walk around the grasslands behind the estate. Only when she grew tired did they begin heading back. The two of them hadn’t spoken much, and their footsteps were quiet. They had just entered the courtyard and had not yet rounded the decorative screen wall when they heard two people chatting softly on the other side.
One of the voices belonged to the little maid they had seen earlier. She was saying, “You didn’t get a proper look earlier… that half of his face is terrifying! The first time I saw it, I almost screamed!”
The moment he heard that, Jian Ru knew they were talking about him, and Aunt Jin’s expression immediately darkened. Rolling up her sleeves, she started marching around the screen wall. Jian Ru quickly grabbed her arm and shook his head.
He didn’t want trouble in someone else’s home.
Besides, being called ugly wasn’t exactly a new experience.
If he took offense every single time, he would have died from anger years ago. Just then, the other maid sighed, answering, “Our Second Young Master is practically an immortal descended from heaven! How did he end up owing a favor to someone like that and getting saddled with this marriage?!”
“That person really is a toad lusting after swan meat…” she clicked her tongue.
Before Jian Ru could even process what she meant, Aunt Jin’s forehead veins were already throbbing. This time she completely lost her patience, slapping away Jian Ru’s hand and marching around the screen wall.
“You two little brats!” she shouted. “Instead of doing your work, you’re standing here gossiping about your masters! Let’s see how I deal with you!”
The two maids yelped as Aunt Jin twisted their ears. Before long, she had chased them back indoors to work. Only after everything grew quiet did Jian Ru slowly walk around the screen wall and approach the old woman.
Aunt Jin glanced at him. “Come on,” she said. “Let’s go inside and have a talk.”
Back in the room where Jian Ru had been recovering, the old woman and the young ger sat opposite one another in two round-backed chairs beside the window.
Jian Ru lowered his head as his fingers twisted together uneasily. Originally, he had been thinking about what Sun Yushuang had said a few days earlier, that Second Young Master Li would “give him an explanation.”
For two whole days, he had kept that matter in mind.
He had even wondered how much money would be appropriate to accept if the Li family wished to repay him. It wasn’t that he was greedy… But practical matters were practical matters, and a person’s principles couldn’t fill an empty stomach.
He had already worked it out. He wouldn’t ask for much, so ten taels of silver would be ideal. If not, three or five taels would still be good.
Even one tael…
He would gladly accept it.
But after Aunt Jin’s repeated remarks today about husbands and childbearing, coupled with what the two maids had said, Jian Ru had finally realized that the “explanation” Second Young Master Li intended to give him might be something entirely different from what he had imagined.
Only now did it occur to him to wonder why someone of Aunt Jin’s status had specifically come to this estate to care for him.
“It was the Second Young Master who specifically informed the family that there wasn’t anyone particularly capable here to look after you,” Aunt Jin said. “That’s why Madam sent me over from the main residence.”
Jian Ru looked up in surprise, then he lowered his head again. The moment he heard the words Second Young Master, his heart trembled, remembering what the maid had said.
“Please… please thank the Madam and… and Second Young Master on my behalf,” he said softly.
“There are plenty of capable servants in the household besides me,” Aunt Jin replied. “The Madam didn’t send me here only for that reason.”
She watched Jian Ru’s expression carefully as she spoke, and Jian Ru raised his head. In truth, he already had a vague idea, and sure enough, Aunt Jin continued, “What do you think about your marriage to the Second Young Master?”
Hearing that, Jian Ru’s mind exploded with a loud boom, and his mouth fell open. He abruptly turned his head aside.
“I… I…”
His voice nearly caught in his throat.
“I don’t want to marry him!”
“You child… You look quite clever, so why are you being foolish at such a crucial moment?!” Aunt Jin looked at him with frustration and disappointment. “You’re a ger whose body has already been seen by a grown man, and you even slept wrapped against him, skin to skin, for an entire night! If you don’t marry him, who else will you be able to marry in the future? Who would still want you?!”
Aunt Jin spoke bluntly, without any restraint. On top of that, Jian Ru had never expected that what happened that night… this old woman actually knew it in such detail, ah! His face instantly burned red, and he stammered, “Y-you… how do you know that…?!”
“On the day you returned, the Madam came to the manor to visit the Second Young Master,” Aunt Jin said. “At that time, the Second Young Master told her everything that happened that night, and afterwards, the Madam told me.”
Jian Ru wanted nothing more than to find a crack in the ground to crawl into. “He… why would he tell everyone?!”
“The Second Young Master didn’t tell everyone,” Aunt Jin defended her master’s family. “He only told his mother. It was necessary to explain clearly before any marriage arrangements could be made.”
Jian Ru was unconvinced and asked, “But how does that Sun Yushuang also seem to know about it?”
“He probably guessed some of it.” Aunt Jin curled her lips. “Don’t mind him. At the time, he was the only one available in the manor, so the Second Young Master had no choice but to ask him to look after you. If it weren’t for him back then…” She glanced at Jian Ru and stopped herself, as if holding something back. “Let’s not talk about that anymore. Back to the marriage, why are you refusing it?!”
“…”
Because he felt unworthy.
Just thinking that someone like that, someone so far above him, would be forced to marry him out of responsibility made Jian Ru feel as if his heart were being twisted.
Those words from the maid, “a toad trying to eat swan meat”, stabbed painfully at him. Sun Yushuang’s disdainful gaze, Jiang Maocai’s words at the river saying his face looked like a ghost, and then the Second Young Master’s immortal-like appearance…
… and the night when that man only glanced at him before fainting in shock.
Jian Ru might have no fate with marriage in this lifetime, but he still had his dignity. He could not and would not cling to someone by exploiting a favor owed, and he still cared about his face and pride. He didn’t want to expose his humiliation in front of Aunt Jin, so he stubbornly shook his head. “I just don’t want to marry,” he said firmly, not giving himself any chance to regret it. “I’ll leave the manor and go home later.”
Aunt Jin tried to persuade him earnestly. “That night was ordered to be kept quiet by the household, but there were still servants and helpers who saw it. They all saw the Second Young Master carry you out himself. People will inevitably talk. It won’t affect the Second Young Master much, but what about your reputation? How will you face people in the future?”
But Jian Ru remained silent like a stubborn gourd, not yielding at all. Aunt Jin tried everything she could for a long while, her throat going dry, but still could not persuade him. In the end, she could only say, “If you’re going to leave, don’t rush it like this! At least finish the last dose of medicine tonight. You can leave tomorrow morning instead.”
Pushing any further would be improper, so Jian Ru finally agreed.
After dinner, he packed up his things simply and waited quietly, planning to leave the next day. But he still did not manage to stay at peace for long, for just after he finished taking his medicine, Aunt Jin said…
The Second Young Master wanted to see him.
T.N: If you like his novel, you can read up to chapter 13 on my Patreon, with new updates coming every week!
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